the never end

I lifted the cat and hugged her.

Even though she’s shit on our bedroom floor and I stepped in it twice.

Barefoot.

Once, as I clomped my way to the john in the dark. Bladder so full of vodka, Sprite, and water that I thought I’d never go back to bed.

The other, a weird moment when I was here, but there–a man dead, but alive–dreaming but awake. It woke me, but instead of cleaning it up I sat on the floor listening to my wife snore.

And I loved her more than I did the day I said I do.

There are more moments like this than I like to admit.

Broken plans.

Wayward dreams.

An intense belief that ghosts do not only exist but push day-after-day to remind us of how quickly this life ends.

But I don’t believe them.

I can’t.

There are cats to hug.

There’s shit to clean up.

And those hands sweeping round silently never ever end.

~ K.J.

 


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