the in-between

Feels like it will never get warm. I can’t bitch though. It’s only January. We have plenty of cold yet to go. Shoveling, scraping. Numb fingers and toes. But that’s fine. That’s what we’ve signed on for. If we didn’t want to be here, we’d move.

Right?

The virus rhetoric is amping up. Politicians are positioning. I’m being told things are bad, bad, bad, but I’m choosing to feel good. Fuck ‘em, as they say. The less I tune into the bullshit, the less shitty I feel. It’s not as hard or tricky or as manipulated as I once believed it to be. It, quite frankly, depends on me and how I react to the world.

Do what is right. That’s the CODE.

And by now, at 48, it’s easy to see that even though people, moments, and experiences are complex, the answer is simple. Do what’s right. And most of the time, that has nothing to do with me.

Getting outside myself is key. To health. Happiness. And how well I navigate and participate in the world. I thrive on watching and listening, but no longer am I happy as a bystander. I’m facilitating positive change as best I can, one decision at a time.

But people want mob mentality. They want me to belong to a cause, a side, a movement. But that’s not going to happen. I am moving, slowly but surely, on my own. Navigating my days with family, and goodness in mind, so that all of us have opportunities to grow and learn and put good into the world.

That’s what it’s about. Not the temperature. Not illness. Not life or death. But the in-between. The part here, while the lights are still on.

~ KJ


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