October 2, 2024 – 5:56 am
Not gonna stop 47-degree mornings. That cold dark slide from summer to fall. Temperatures affect me more deeply at 51 than they did at 25. I can’t remember 25. I’m sure I stopped and stared at the stars like I did today. Same lights seen with different eyes. I wanted then what I have now. Family. Connectedness. Some stuff. We always want some stuff. We don’t always have family or connections. Strive your whole life for stuff, for causes, for winning fights that can’t be won—laser focused on becoming somebody that makes a difference—and you don’t make a difference at all. Sure, your name and actions as related to things that don’t matter will live on, but when it comes to the impact you’ve really made outside of your great accomplishments, what will it be? Were you present? Involved? Supportive and listening? Did you learn enough to keep quiet, listen, and love? Or were you busy showing the world how important you are?
It’s fun—this climb. The game. The becoming. But it doesn’t mean much. None of it does. We should be more lighthearted. More forgiving. Less frustrated. Happier. Hopeful. That’s when the big wins take place. That’s how we make a difference.
It’s Wednesday. I have before me another opportunity to make good decisions, do good for others. Embrace each moment head-on, crack it open, and see what’s inside. Or let time fall into my hands then slip through my fingers because I’m caught up in what doesn’t matter. It’s hard to say which way I’ll go. It’s early. Only three-quarters of a cup of coffee into me. Awake since 5:30. Feeling like going back to bed. Not looking forward to going out there into the chilled air. Going to work. But there’s plenty along the way to be aware of and enjoy. My wife up—fresh-faced and ready for her day. The ride with my daughter to school. Saying hello to co-workers. Recognizing that they too may not be feeling this day. Could be they just want to go back to bed. Hit reset. Try again tomorrow.
It all adds up and is what it is—which is exactly whatever you make it. With or without intention. So, my best advice to my 51-year-old self this fine October morning is simply this—pay attention.
~ KJ
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